Monday, April 11, 2011

I Got Toys

The following is an explanation:

One day the Blue Faerie was walking through a field just outside of Madison. She pranced by some cows, and some protesters. She strolled right past her family, not to mention a giant, hulking bellydancing monster licking its lips and jingling as she passed. She even skipped Little Bunny Foo Foo who was scooping up field mice and bopping them on the heads (Him, she only really paid attention to when her mind reverted back to songs from preschool.).

All of the mundane. All of the stress and pain. All of these sleepless nights that these things caused (Well, excluding the cows perhaps. When the wind wasn't carrying their farts into the downtown.). And even the one sleepless night when it all came crashing down at 12:30AM when she realized that Elroy the hamster had either been murdered by his cage mate, or died of natural causes (Either way, Elroy's face was missing.). All of this she left behind for her new toy...

Oh, and also she left behind the fact that the hafla a few weeks ago was not thought of as confusing by all, but only by her. Apparently not paying attention to Facebook announcements actually isn't a good thing. ...The Blue Faerie should really get the heck off Facebook.

An Interjection:
I know that material items can't make my life completely and ultimately fulfilling. But damn it, they sure can make it easier to ignore your problems! I've been taking this thing everywhere I go and I love it! Just by putting it on automatic my photos have so much better quality. I went to the Como Zoo on Saturday and went a bit nuts in the herpetarium. Hence, our little poison dart pal above, and the another thing that could kill you below.

Ah, but the new toy wasn't the only thing that helped the Blue Faerie go completely oblivious to her own life. She had also recently watched the movie, "How to Start Your Own Country" with her coworker. After declaring her desk its very own nation, and waging war on the United Peoples of Americorpsia's deskland for over a week, the Blue Faerie made the strategic decision to blend the awesomeness of her new toy with the creative prowess of her office mate. A new battle was soon waged on the other Americorp's desk in the valorous attempt to increase the office bagel supply...

The past week's events may not have been a solution to her issues, but they have been a much needed mental vacation. Perhaps next week the Blue Faerie will go Goodwill shopping to prolong this period of hilarity. Oh, also, the Blue Faerie has lost eleven pounds. So that's something else she passed up in the field. Woot! :) 


Meganne said...

Ha! This is fantastic! I'm pro-more bagels!

Leeanna said...

Way too much time on your hands, girlfriend. I love your new toy though.

For Narnia and Aslan??? Royal kleenex box??? Oh boy!!

Dark Mother said...

Is it wrong that when I saw the title I was eagerly awaiting talk of vibrators?

Heathen said...

Girl you are insane! But in a good way of course.

Hand over the bagels and no one gets hurt!

The Blue Faerie said...

@Meganne - My coworker actually did bring us bagels! I got one of those apple cinnamon ones from Einsteins. :)

@Leeanna - It's not that we have the time, it's that we don't have the sanity left. The kids don't have spring break until next week, and the staff has been trying to find different ways to count down the days. Army men, and cowboys and Indians are just me and my coworker's way of not succumbing to our urge to torture children. :P

@Dark Mother - Perhaps you need a spring break too? :P

@Heathen - Is that a challenge to battle? Because I assure you, Heathen, the great armies of Hispanialand shall be ready for you! Besides, our armies went a little nuts in the partying. They ate all the bagels and...well... TP'ed the Indians' tee pees. But despite the fact that our troops have a hard time holding their peppermint Schnapps, we will protect future bagel supplies with our lives! :P